Karim Serageldin shares tips to launch 2019 in with a bang!
By Nisreen F.
Nisreen by day is a Speech and Language therapist working with adults with neurological conditions, but by night she works for NaTakallam- a start up that helps displaced people and refugees earn income through teaching their native language online. If there are any hours left, Nisreen loves to play piano and go climbing (indoors!)
By Monique Hassan
Another work week is here, time for excessive amounts of caffeine and a jungle of sticky notes. We all love the feeling of a productive day, that sense of accomplishment when we really made the most out of our time.
A common mindset is that greater productivity means working harder and for longer stints of time. Although this works for some people, this can lead to burnout and a decrease in focus.
Work Smarter Not Harder. Time is Valuable.
Here are 7 practical tips to make this week more productive.
- Start out the day right. Give yourself enough time to do at least 10 minutes of exercise in the morning. High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT) is great for this. Slow down during morning prayers. Eat a healthy breakfast aimed at fueling you.
- Positive Affirmations. Look in the mirror and tell yourself “I am successful, I believe in myself”. Be your own cheerleader!
- Schedule the day. Set goals for the day and outline when you will achieve them. Take this opportunity to set weekly goals as well. Be realistic and don’t overload yourself.
- Give up Perfection. We are often our own worst critic. Aim to complete your goals and take satisfaction in that. It is great to have high standards, but don’t burden yourself with unattainable levels of perfection.
- Stay Organized. Your environment can impact how you feel. An organized and clean environment is more conducive towards a productive and focused day.
- Take a Break. Downtime helps you re-charge. You can also assess what you have accomplished and what else needs to be done.
- Review Your Performance. Look back over the day and smile at what you achieved, make mental notes for what you can improve.
Increased productivity serves to boost your sense of accomplishment and self-worth. Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t achieve every goal you set for the day, do the best that you can and keep moving forward. Reward yourself for accomplishments and identify areas you have room for improvement. The biggest room in the world is the room for improvement.
The Prophet used to seek refuge in Allah from laziness in the following duaa: “O Allah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men.” Sahih al-Bukhari 6369
Originally published on About Islam
I fell in love with one of my classmates at college, my dear friend, but I haven't seen him since we graduated a year ago. I miss him a lot and this causes unbearable pain and suffering. What shall I do? I feel lost.
RESPONSE by Karim Serageldin
As-Salaamu ’Alaikum sister,
I’m sorry to hear about your sadness and pain. I understand what it feels like to miss someone you endear. I will treat your situation as if you have a crush on your classmate since there is no indication that you two were in a mutual relationship. Tips to move on from your crush:
Naivety can be dangerous
Many people who have little relationship experience confuse someone being nice to them liking or loving you. It is not the same! I know someone who believed a co-worker was in love with her just because he sat with her at the cafeteria to talk during lunch break. This person “waited” for three years to get a proposal when the evidence clearly indicated that he did not love her but was just being cordial.
Accept that you have crush
Once you realize that he may not have the same feelings as you, the reality becomes clear- it is mostly in your mind. Look in the mirror and admit to yourself that you have a crush and that he does not think or feel about you in the way you hoped. I know this is hard but so is living in a fantasy which has led to suffering and pain for one year!
Recognize it may be best
You may not be compatible as a future couple. Friends are not always the best material for marriage. You may realize in the future that it was best that it did not turn into something more. Trust that God will connect you with the right person when you are ready.
All experience is good
Whether things turn out the way you want them or not, all experience, pleasurable or painful, is good because you always learn something and gain lessons of wisdom! Life will always have transitory events and situations that will refine and polish you physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
The more you replay the hurt and fantasy in your mind the more your heart will hurt and you may even feel anger. This cycle is like self-poisoning – you are the one that keeps drinking the poison elixir you create by replaying and dwelling on something that may not be true or may never become true.
Direct yourself forward
When you go through heartbreak, you must remove all triggers that remind you of that person. Instead, focus on connecting with close friends who can support you, having hobbies of interest, and so on. Avoid living in the past and looking him on social media. In the future, try to actually build a relationship with a man who is interested in doing so and learn more about those signs.
May Allah help you,